You’re Actually Doing Great!

Feeding a baby is such hard work, no matter the method, and can be one of, if not the most, stressful parts of the early weeks of parenthood. 

First of all, you are filled with overwhelming love and compassion for your tiny new human (or humans) who is utterly dependent on you, and you are desperate to do right by them in this first and very important job. Secondly, you’re doing all of this while healing from the emotional and physical rigors of the birthing process and under tremendous sleep deprivation. Then, the pressures that we put on ourselves to do it perfectly are real, and the expectations we feel from family, society, and providers are ever present as well. At the same time, there’s really not that much support available for breastfeeding or even formula and bottle feeding - physicians themselves receive a very minimal amount of training on the topic that they can pass on to you, and once you return home, you’re left very much on your own to figure things out. 

Is it any wonder that so many families feel completely stressed out, adrift, abandoned and upset about infant feeding?! 

In the context of this massive societal failure to support you holistically with feeding your baby, I urge you to remember that you are actually doing GREAT. You’re caring for your tiny baby with great compassion and care around the clock with little sleep, and with tender, recovering bodies. You are reading their cues and cries, assessing their needs, figuring out new tools, memorizing numbers, learning new rules, recording data. You are advocating for your baby and your family. 

One day, you aren’t going to think in ml’s and ounces anymore. You aren’t going to worry about whether or how much formula your baby drank today. Your baby is going to be drinking water from a sippy cup for hydration, going to be sticking little yogurt bites all over their hands and trying with terrible aim to try to get them into their mouth. They’re going to try banana, sweet potato, and applesauce. Even crazier, they’ll likely go through a white-foods-only phase in preschool that will drive you completely crazy. They will greatly prefer boxed macaroni and cheese to the Barefoot Contessa’s homemade recipe. They’ll go to summer camp and spend their pocket money at the canteen every day on an orange slushy AND a candy bar. All of this is to say - every minute feels so freighted right now, but it won’t always. It’s not all as impending as it seems. It isn’t the final commentary on your parenting. You’re actually doing great.

What matters most to all of us on the team at DC Birth Doulas is that you aren’t suffering alone. Your Doulas, the Peer-Support Circles, and Mindful Movement Sessions are all here to support you and your amazing body. We don’t care how you feed your baby, we only care that you aren’t suffering and don’t feel alone. 

Keep up the good work!

~ Naomi, Infant Feeding Expert

*If you need help to schedule your bundled Infant Feeding session with Naomi…email Elizabeth Parish.